This is for you Survivor freaks out there. Do you remember Jenna? No, not the hot Jenna, the ugly one. Trust me, after you hear why, you’ll wish it was the hot one also. No, the one with the blonde hair that came in third place in Survivor All Stars? The one who said she was fine with not winning the money because she’s richer than ever now that she’s found a man and is getting married? (ahem..bullshit..ahem)
Jenna, along with so many other celebs (or semi celebs in her case), has become just the next person to make a sex tape and have it get out on the internet. Now, I’ve never made a sex tape. But if I did, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be dumb enough to let it get out on the internet. Unless it was with Elizabeth Hurley, then you guys could download it right here. But seriously, how stupid are these people? “Honey, make sure you put the money in the safe before the cleaning crew show up, but leave the homegrown porn we just made on the counter. Oh, and make sure you write PRIVATE SEX TAPE on it. That should ensure that no one messes with it”.
Let me recap. It’s in a hotel room at New York, New York hotel and casino in Vegas. It’s Jenna’s and her husband, who we’ll call Mr. Jenna, on their honeymoon. Anyway, Jenna and Mr. Jenna went a little crazy with the handicam. They do it all, and catch all the action on film. Wait…uh…..okay, sorry, thought I was going to puke….again. It’s like the Paris Hilton Video Part 2. And yes, for all you blind jackasses out there, Paris Hilton is NOT good looking. If you look past her pocket book, which I understand is hard to do, you will see nothing but an ugly skank. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either related to her, lying, or blind.
If you ask me, which you kind of are since you’re here reading this, I think these idiots deserve what they get. This is assuming that half of them didn’t let these tapes out on purpose, which I’m not too sure of yet. It seems that they pop out (Janet Jackson pun intended) at the most opportune times. Paris to promote a show, Jenna to stretch her 15 minutes to 15.02. Conspiracy theories are running wild around here!
If you’ll excuse me, I know the government is monitoring this as I type, and I don’t want to give them too much information.