Nov 29
Torque?
I think I need to compile a list of the shittiest movies ever made. It would be a tough list though, because there are a TON of movies that qualify. Although lately I’ve only been concerned with movies that are recent, and really terrible.
Last night I watched the movie Torque. It stars Martin Henderson (Peter Facinelli called and wants his DNA back) and Ice Cube. Now, I have seen parts of this movie over the past few years, and it always seemed pretty bad but apparently I had never seen the last half hour or so. Two words: God Awful. I was dumbfounded at the ridiculous action sequences they are trying to pass off as possible. I watched it till the end because I couldn’t believe the pile of shit that Hollywood was trying to pass off as a full featured film. If, while watching this movie, you think that what you just saw was so impossibly wretched that you can’t believe yours eyes, wait another minute and they will shock you with an even more unbelievable chain of events.
Generally speaking, I like Ice Cube. I’m an old skool rap guy which I’m sure is part of it. But when the standards you set for someone as an actor, is his role as Desolation Williams in Ghosts of Mars, there’s really no where to go but up. Then he made Torque. If the goal of the filmmakers was to make a less believable version of 2 Fast 2 Furious, they succeeded. Which has to be tough to do, since 2 Fast was fucking garbage. Martin Henderson makes Paul Walker look like Al Pacino. Well, not really, Paul Walker is still the worst piece of shit actor to ever get a job in Hollywood. Sorry Martin, as terrible as you are, you’re still better than that douche bag.
This movie was so bad that I actually went blind for about an hour after watching it. I’ve decided that instead of invoicing the movie makers for my time that was wasted on this crap, I should sue them for the permanent scars left on my psyche. Maybe a class action suit, anyone else see this enormous pile of cow poo?
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You can add Charlie and the crap factory to that list of yours.
This travisty was witnessed by my household last night.
I love the origional and they murdered it.
really horrible
Awesome…simply awesome, I figured sometime or another you would come across this movie and tear the ass out of it. I saw it…unfortunately, but really, how sweet would it be to be in a high speed bike chase on top of a train?!? The only good thing to come out of this movie was the chick, I think her name was Shane…she’s almost worth watching it again. HA!
Yeah, she wasn’t exactly hard on the eyes. She was also the chick from 40 Days 40 Nights. The one that xeroxs her ass on the copy machine. That was another thing about Torque, they just had a pretty cast. I think that the filmakers thought that if they had a pretty cast, the movie could suck and people would still like it. But they were wrong. Way wrong.
But seriously, how bad was it when Monet Mazur (blonde chick) and Jaime Prestley had the “bike fight”. When they were doing wheelies and hitting eachother with their motorcycles. They were swinging them aroung like baseball bats. Horrid. Absolutely horrid.
I know this is totally off the subject, but you have got to try this. Someone please explain????
http://trunks.secondfoundation.org/files/psychic.swf
It’s a math problem. Any number from 1-99 added together then subtracting that sum by the original number, will either equal 0 or a number divisible by 9. So all the symbols at 0 and at ‘9 x whatever’ are the same.
PS
81 is as high as you can go with this, so everything over 81 is just there for show.
Yeah, I didn’t realize that was the same girl, but it for sure is…and the bike fight, wow. I’d like to meet the dork that thought that would make a cool scene.
Torque is tight.
Frankly, ill have to agree, it was horrible. its a good thing Martin Henderson is a hot piece of ass as is my favorite actor Treat Willioms.
(Look for him in the new released dvd box set”the Substitute1,2,3,and 4″ and januarys sequels 5,6,7,8,9,and the grand finally where he rids the entire public school system of crime,once and for all. The Substitute10 Final Exam.
Well, there is a reason that Treat Williams is one of Hollywoods hottest right now.
Wait a second……
LOL OMG… i am totally cracking up… Candela you kill me… !