A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a
house: “Talking Dog For Sale.”

He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard.
The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting
there.

“You talk?” he asks.

“Yes, I do,” the Lab replies.

“So, what’s your story?”

The Lab looks up and says, “Well, I discovered that I could talk when I
was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA
about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to
country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one
figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable
spies for eight years running.”

“But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t
getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at
the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious
characters and listening in.” “I uncovered some incredible dealings and
was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I’m just retired.”

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for
the dog.

“Ten dollars,” the guy says.

“Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so
cheap?”

“Because he’s a liar. He never did any of that shit.”

Clay and Meg had their second baby last night!!

Quinlin Zain Johnson
8lbs 5oz 20.5″

Madeline now has a little brother!!

Congrats guys!

Thanks to Keko for this:

Microsoft re-doing the iPod packaging. This vid is great! (better with the music where possible)

2007 is the year of the geek! Well, geek movies that is.

Click me for the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Trailer!!

Here’s something fun. I have to turn in my Explorer. The Ford dealership I bought my car from has been calling and leaving messages telling me to get ahold of them to figure out what it is I’m going to get into, after I turn in my truck. Yesterday, they called and I was home. When I got on the phone, the lady I was speaking to wasn’t very friendly. She actually seemed annoyed. She said that she was calling about my truck. I told her that I would like to make an appointment to turn it in on Thursday. She told me that they were really busy, and Thursday didn’t look good. I said fine, when would be good then. After a “sigh” she said she would check. While she was looking through her book, she muttered “you already have a new car right?”

I said “no I don’t”.

“Oh, really?” she says. “Oh, well what were you thinking about getting?” All of a sudden, she was a friggin ray of sunshine. Not only did her demeanor do a 180, but miraculously an opening on thursday popped up! Go fucking figure. Take some advice from me, if you’re turning in a car and you have a new one already, don’t tell them that. Tell them you have no idea what to get, and will see your salesman after you turn your car in, and you should get treated like you should have been to begin with.

Man, what a great weekend. We went to Canada on Thursday night, and came home Sunday night. Nice relaxing weekend. We also had a nice experience at the border, which hasn’t happened in a while. As a matter of fact, we stopped going to Canada because of the grief we get at the border when we’re trying to come home. Apperantly my old truck was flagged as Al Queda because we got pulled over and searched everytime we came home. We were told it was random, but don’t give me that bullshit. We weren’t randomly picked to get searched, every fucking time we crossed. On top of the hassle of having to quaratine the dog while they searched my truck, the border patrol, generally speaking, are pricks. Aside from the booth people, I’ve never met a pleasant border gaurd. They’re always pissed off at something, and taking it out on the people that get pulled over. Maybe it’s the Hummer. Maybe the Explorer had a bad aura about it. Time will tell.

We didn’t have any problems though. No lines, 4 questions, a smile, and a “have a good night”. Good stuff.

We had a nice time at the campground. For those of you that don’t know, it’s really rustic type camping up there. Only 3 TV’s (with cable), one bathroom, and central air. Roughing it, for sure. I love it. Biking, sitting by the fire, playing Rummy 5 trillion, poker, whatever. It was just a damn good time. Pretty much exactly what I neede after two pretty fucked up weeks at work.

Now, it’s back to the grind. The one downside to me taking time off, is nothing gets done while I’m gone. I mean, nothing. I was off for two business days, and I come in this morning with a workload that looks like 2 months. I better get to it….

Kel and I saw Pirates of the Caribbean 2 last night. So..is it “care-a-bee-in” or “kah-rib-ee-in”? I say it the first way.

Anyway.

We both loved the first movie, so we were pretty excited to see this one. First off, it was long. I mean, what’s the deal lately? I’ve seen two movies in the last few months, and both have been rediculously long. So Pirates was another 2.5 hour flick.

Did it seem like 2.5 hours? Well, yes. That was part of the problem. The movie dragged on a little. It was still fun to watch, but after the movie was over, you’re left with the feeling that it was nothing but a setup for the third one. I know, I know. This is very normal in this, the age of the sequel. However, I firmly believe that each movie should stand on it’s own.

All that being said, this was a fun movie. If you’re a fan of the first one, you should enjoy this one. Same great action, and characters.

Oh yeah, and the ending was friggin GREAT.

PS
We also saw a teaser trailer for Transformers the movie. Can’t wait for that flick.

Tonight on VH1 was the premier of the World Series of Pop Culture. Kel and I are really good at pop culture trivia, so we were excited to watch this show. One thing we realized is that we would KILL every team we’ve seen so far. I mean totally murder them. We would add Candela to our team, and we would totally blow away anyone they put in out path.

It wouldn’t even be fair.

The way it works is there are two teams of 3 people. The teams are given a category, and they pick which member of their team that will play that round. A coin toss decided who gets the first question, then the questions are alternated through the rest of the round. If someone gets a question wrong, the other team can steal that point. Each round has 6 questions. The team that loses a round, loses the player in that round for the rest of the game.

So, there was this team that lost the first two rounds. It was down to the girl on their team to take out all three players of the other team. She took out the first guy, no problem. Then she took out the second guy. It was down to her, and the last player from the other team. VH1 then went to commercial, for the last time before 11:00 and the show ended. Here’s where VH1 fucked up.

They showed a commercial for next weeks show, and they said the teams that won this week! Before they even showed it on TV! WTF? We were watching it to see who won, then all of a sudden we knew without even seeing it. VH1 actually Eileened their own show! Kel and I couldn’t believe it. Fricken idiots at VH1.

It was a cool show though. There is no doubt in my mind that a team of Kel, Candela and myself would absoluelty destroy any of those idiots they have on the show. Next season, we should go for it.

Oh yeah, it’s on. It’s on like Donkey Kong.

How many of these can you name? There is 7 I can’t get. I know I’ve seen them before, but damn….

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